stream of consciousness

Fadra challenged us this week to go deeper. I saw that as the opportunity to dump my brain even more.

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The easiest way to describe myself these days is on edge. I know I need to relax. I know I am bring a drama queen. I know that I need to calm the f down.

But I can’t.

I am on edge.

Every little thing strikes a nerve.

I am irritable.

I am antsy.

I am, afterall, pregnant.

I can feel my blood pressure start to rise when I get in those situations {and unfortunately, they seem to revolve around the kiddo}. His not listening to me, his blowing me off, his bossiness. It all hits me right to the core and it irritates me to no end. And then I become annoying with my constant yelling {ugh} and saying his name. I know it must annoy the hubster {and everyone around} because it sure as hell annoys me.

And I hate feeling that way.

I long for the weekends all week. Then 5 minutes in and I am counting the minutes to nap time, bed time and, sadly, Monday morning.

I think it is a combination of his age and my being a hormonal beast right now.

It’s not a good combination.

And it doesn’t look good on me.

I know it won’t be this way forever {please say it won’t}. I want to fast forward through these moments and get to the good part.