Words Hurt: Put An End To Bullying Now

A few weeks ago, I signed Ethan up for Kindergarten. It was a bittersweet day. I am excited for him to start his formal schooling but I am also worried. I worried about the other kids. Sure when I was growing, we had our bullies. But kids these days? They are really cruel. And they are starting at such young ages.

I worry because Ethan is a shy and sensitive kid. I worry about the day that he may come home from school in tears because someone was mean to him. And I am not sure exactly how to handle it.

One of the ways we have been preparing him for the “big school” is by reassuring him that “yes, he will meet new friends” and “yes, they will like you.” But it’s hard not think in the back of your head “but what if he doesn’t ” and “what if they don’t?”.

No one wants to think that their child would be a bullied. Unfortunately, it is something we have to worry about.

On the flip side, I also worry about Ethan going with the crowd and bullying another child. We have talked about how you need to be nice to other kids and if someone bothers you, you just move on and play with someone else. There’s no reason to use words that hurt.

words hurt

So how can you teach your child about bullying? Here are some helpful tips.

Help Stop Bullying

1. Provide a safe and loving home. If your child feels safe in their home, they are more likely to feel comfortable to open up and tell you about any possible bullying.

2. Communicate. Talk to your child! But, more importantly, listen to them. Explain what bullying is and how no should be bullied.

3. If your child is being bullied, don’t blame them.

4. Be on the look out for a change in behavior. This is a warning sign that your child might being bullied at school.

5. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Your child’s school has counselors that are trained to help with bullying. Ask them for their help.

6. Be your child’s advocate. If you feel your child’s school is not doing all that they can for your child, don’t back down. Demand that they do something. Seek the help of the Principal. and if you have to the Superintendent of the school district,  if the bullying persists.

7. Set a good example for your child. Speak respectfully and control your temper.

8. Teach your child what not to do. “Keep your hands to yourself.” “If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything.”

9. Teach them what they should do if they are bullied. Tell them it’s ok to walk away or to tell the bully to stop. If they are still being bullied, make sure they know to go get an adult.

As a mom, I feel strongly about teaching anti-bullying behavior. Not only does it need to be taught in school, it needs to start at home.

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  1. I just recently started following you. Let me tell you, having a kid who is bullied is hard. Last year, my daughter was bullied for lots of things. She is tall, smart, blonde, white (very pale….we use LOTS of sunscreen), and her hair is LONG (almost to her rear-end).

    Anyways, last year, kids were picking on her for being too smart. They told her she was too white to do anything. “White kids can’t ________! (fill in ANY verb there!)” They called her Rapunzel. She was too tall! It was terrible.

    Finally, after she came home in tears on a day when I wasn’t having a great day, I took care of it. I emailed the teacher (calling would have been a horrible idea) and told her that i would be at school the next morning. I expected her to speak to me and it would be dealt with the following day!

    It did stop for a while, but mean kids will be mean.

    All we could do was every day reassure her that being smart was awesome. Her long hair and pale skin made her beautiful. She would always be able to reach higher goals that anyone because she would be taller than them. (Sometimes we even told her that the other kids’ parents just didn’t know how to raise them right! You’ll do anything when your kid is in tears…..)

    But…. it made her stronger and made her stand up for herself.

    Sorry for the “novel” here! I hope you don’t have to go through the same thing. Just reassure him that he is PERFECT for you just the way he is….. that is all he needs!

    1. Thank you for sharing your story! Sounds like you are raising a very beautiful, smart, and strong daughter!

  2. These are great tips! I think that number one is key! If there is bullying that happens, he will feel safe to share with you and you can help solve the issue.

  3. Thanks for posting this – I took the pledge and I really hope that things change. It is so sad and scary to hear about all the bullying today – I plan on raising our daughter to know about it and make sure that she tells us if she is being bullied and to not be a bully.

  4. Thanks for posting these tips Steph! I hear you and as a mom totally agree that it is my worst nightmare for my kiddos. It is hard to watch and see and even more sickening to think that it actually is a reality for many kids…I’ll be signing that pledge!

  5. We had a problem with Girl Scouts, of all things. My daughter went to a private school, and all the girls in the troop went to pubic school and they just decided they didn’t like her. It got to the point where I’d pick her up and she’d be crying in the bathroom. She didn’t go back. It broke my heart.

  6. Unfortunately, bullying is a fact of life, for now. So we all must work together to help stop it. We must never believe the old saying about sticks and stones because names do hurt!

  7. Thanks for this! My son is only 3, but we’ve already run into instances on the play ground or at indoor play spaces with older kids and I’ve had no idea how to handle it. So I especially appreciate 8 and 9 right now. A lot of it is “typical kid behavior” but there’s a point where they will need to handle it on their own by walking away or coming to tell me.

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